Gnats--I hate gnats!

I think I am usually a pretty even-keeled person. I think everyone but Brad and a few select students (you know who you are) would agree to this statement. I tend to go with the flow, and I am rarely annoyed (not even in traffic). However, my laid back sensibilities have been put to the test of late. Here are a few of the things that are under my proverbial craw:

1. Gnats (or maybe they are fruit flies) and earwigs. In a fit of absolute and utter rage, I just killed, or should I say annihilated, a gnat/fruit fly by swatting at it repeatedly with half a ream of typing paper (it was the only thing with body nearby). Our building is infested with them, and they are driving me batty. I am thinking of taking a day off so as to have a gnat-free day.

But if I took the day off, I would have to deal with the earwigs and earwig carcasses in my year-old much beloved house. At first we thought these squiggily black bugs with forked tales were some kind of odd breed of silverfish. We had the exterminator come out and spray--twice. But apparently silverfish spray does not work on earwigs. Plus, as the Internet sites about earwigs state, earwigs do not live in your house; they live in your gardens. They only come in your house, sometimes in droves, to seek light and to seek water. Thus the reason you find them near your drains. These Internet sites seem to think that I should take solace in the fact that they live in my garden and only visit my house. This does not give me solace. They are unwanted guests, and they simply will not get the message that they are not welcome. Each time I see one, anger just wells up inside me. I haven't been able to take a much beloved bubble bath in months because apparently they really like my tub, and I am totally grossed out.

2. Allergies. I forgot to take my Lortadine(sp) this morning. That means I am an itchy, sniffing fool today with a mild headache. Maybe that's the reason I am so annoyed?

3. The hole-puncher in the Junior High office. It will only take 10 sheets of paper. If you try to hole-punch 11 sheets, it grabs them with its claw-like hole-punching apparatuses and won't let go. Then you have to shake it at just the right velocity to dislodge your papers. Very annoying.

4. Talking on the telephone. Heather Byars already mentioned how she hates to talk on the telephone on her blog (if I knew how to link, I would), and I whole-heartedly agree. I don't know if it is because I am a teacher, and I talk to probably 100+ people everyday, but when I get home, I hate to talk on the phone. I really love my caller ID, and I love the fact that we don't have an answering machine. That annoys my mother.

--I just killed another gnat this time with my hand. Gross!--

5. Mildew. I think am more than annoyed with mildew. I believe I hate it, despise it. This hatred, though, has led me to one of my greatest loves: Soft Scrub with Bleach. This is fabulous stuff. It kills that mildew dead and leaves your shower sparkling clean. And I do love a sparkling clean shower.

6. The fact that. . .

• making hamburgers makes your house smell like meat for about 3 days.
• I have lost five pounds, but my clothes fit the same, and the fact that I have been working out really hard for two months and all I have lost is 5 pounds.
• and, this might be the most annoying,
  the fact that I am teaching students who were born the year I graduated from high school.
  
  Disclaimer: The students are not annoying (most of them aren't anyway); the fact that they were born the year I graduated high school is annoying.

And the way blogger does bullet-points is really annoying.

The End.